I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
