I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm sobbing to NWA
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
