before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
