Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
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