can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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