Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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