fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
That reminds me...we need to get swords
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
