Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Randomize