So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
