your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
