Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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