there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
