he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
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