You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
