Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
