it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
