i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
