The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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