Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
His hands were made for my vagina.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
