New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
there is glitter all over my balls
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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