put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
