Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
