I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
