i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
you inspire me to be a worse person
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
