I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
