shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize