I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
