My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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