do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
