Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
