im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Found your dick twin last night
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
