Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Randomize