That's intense
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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