this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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