i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
it hurts more in the daytime
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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