last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
