I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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