If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
