Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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