i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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