North Korea, Best Korea!
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
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