this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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