Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
