similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Walk of Shame today included voting.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
