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  • next time, masturbate inside a vagina

    Submitted by oregon_donor on Jul 3, 10 at 7:37pm
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  • As someone who likes to swim, allow me to be the first to wish you a sunburn in an uncomfortable place.

    Submitted by IrregularMe on Jul 3, 10 at 7:29pm
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  • Also drunk enough to misspell masturbating.

    Submitted by Brentman12 on Jul 3, 10 at 8:15pm
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  • Don't expose your uretha to bromine. It will punish you later.

    Submitted by caretaker22 on Jul 3, 10 at 7:11pm
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  • I don't know about masterbating, but masturbating in the pool seems like a good idea.

    Submitted by anonmyous on Jul 3, 10 at 8:30pm
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  • just stay out of the swallow, er, shallow end...

    Submitted by buzzcutt on Jul 3, 10 at 9:49pm
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  • So... not too drunk then.

    Submitted by Onthejob on Jul 3, 10 at 10:56pm
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  • Rachel I have that book but haven't read it since I'm still reading another. I can't wait to read Guts :P.

    Submitted by singer4life666 on Jul 19, 10 at 4:31am
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  • guts - chuck palahniuk. all I have to say.

    Submitted by freddykrueger on Jul 3, 10 at 7:29pm
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  • It is an awesome idea. Use the jet things on the side of the pool. *sigh* good times

    Submitted by noah13 on Jul 4, 10 at 9:03am
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  • stupid enough to agree!

    Submitted by damn_gurl on Jul 3, 10 at 9:56pm
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  • 4 Words: Guts by Chuck Palahniuk\nThe narrator describes an incident in which he sat on the water intake at the bottom of a swimming pool while masturbating. The suction caused his rectum and lower intestines to prolapse and become tangled in the filter, forcing the narrator to gnaw through his own innards in order to free himself and avoid drowning. The narrator's sister later becomes impregnated by semen deposited by the narrator in the pool, which results in her having an abortion.

    Submitted by oompa on Jul 3, 10 at 10:24pm
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  • I just had a flashback to the time I read Palahniuk's short story Guts and almost threw up in class.

    Submitted by Rachelridestoruk on Jul 4, 10 at 9:20am
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  • Lol don't put the bottom cleaner up to ur dick I couldn't get it off!!

    Submitted by iKillFirstPeople on Jul 3, 10 at 9:45pm
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  • I don't even have to be drunk to do that.. it feels amazing sober.

    Submitted by chelseaxxx on Jul 3, 10 at 9:11pm
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  • Abortions are always the way to go

    Submitted by agraw on Jul 4, 10 at 5:00am
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  • it really is an awesome idea

    Submitted by dubbydubs on Jul 3, 10 at 7:19pm
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  • Buzzcut, that was a FAIL! Like really, not even a little bit funny or original. :/

    Submitted by elite on Jul 4, 10 at 1:05am
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  • Don't you be lighting that sacred candle!!!!

    Submitted by Nick2Syller on Jul 3, 10 at 7:29pm
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  • Always a good decision. Unless you have a vagina, then Chlorine is not your friend.

    Submitted by Briannaaaaa on Jul 4, 10 at 12:08am
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  • Just did it myself about a half hour ago. Always a good idea.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 3, 10 at 9:46pm
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  • good night for him, bad night for everyone else

    Submitted by mellythepirate on Jul 4, 10 at 1:57am
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  • Ok the story guts is impossible and even if meant to be fictional sounds quite stupid his intestines would probably not get sucked on and if they did I don't think he would have time to naw them while underwater. Also chlorine kills sperm anyway so no pregnancy

    Submitted by CrimsonRegret on Jul 3, 10 at 11:17pm
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  • 7:37 how is that possible. I guess some dudes can get there hand and cock together in a vagina

    Submitted by phrozenstare on May 21, 11 at 8:05pm
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  • Sounds like an idea the ex-president of Detroit Public Schools would come up with.

    Submitted by kcs99 on Jul 4, 10 at 4:05am
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  • You better hope the suction isn't too much

    Submitted by wtfwjd on Jul 3, 10 at 11:46pm
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  • I would suggest getting out afterwards... Or atleast a pair of goggles

    Submitted by feetspace on Jul 3, 10 at 8:22pm
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  • Done it. Good times. Just swim away from the semen before it sticks to you. :)

    Submitted by jbubbya on Jul 3, 10 at 8:44pm
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  • It could be a guy. If so, just have your sperm float around in the pool. Fun for everyone!

    Submitted by singer4life666 on Jul 3, 10 at 7:17pm
    63 146
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