so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
