it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
