Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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