Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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