That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Randomize
