fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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